Christmas without the kids: Co-op Legal Services predicts spike in child arrangement requests

As Christmas nears, Co-op Legal Services anticipates a peak in child arrangement enquiries from parents who are separated as they face the prospect of the festive period without their children.

The national legal provider’s business data reveals over a quarter (28%) of its child arrangement enquiries in 2022 came in the last three months of the year, higher than any other time of the year,  showing the link between the approach of Christmas and conflict between parents over who has the children.

With over 110,000 divorces taking place every year in the UK, for many this Christmas will be the first without the family.

The festive period is a time of year renowned for bringing families together and for many, over the course of a marriage family traditions develop. As such, following a separation comes the realisation those formed Christmas habits are gone.

Having been used to putting the children to bed on Christmas Eve or spending the morning opening presents, the thought of waking up to an empty house can be isolating following the breakdown of a relationship.

Ben Evans, Lead Family Law Solicitor at Co-op Legal Services, says: “Having worked with lots of people that experience their first Christmas on their own following divorce, dissolution of a civil partnership, or a separation, it’s easy to see how isolating and lonely this time can be. The key I believe is to not focus on what used to be and instead focus on new ways to celebrate and enjoy Christmas. Let go of the old traditions and try to embrace the fact that you can now make new ones.”

Tips from Co-op Legal Services’ Lead Family Law Solicitor, Ben Evans:

Be flexible

‘’Christmas isn’t all about celebrating on 25th December. Both parents can create their own Christmas day with the kids, they’ll still enjoy it just as much! It’s also important to prioritise the happiness of the children – now is not the time to cause conflict or be resentful about your ex-partner.’’

Money, Money, Money

‘’Separations can be time consuming and costly, meaning money can often be difficult after a split. Try not to make things all about the presents, it’s not a competition and it’s the feelings the kids will remember – not the actual gifts.’’

Help others

‘’If you’re feeling a little lonely, volunteer! Get involved in the local community or get together with other people who are spending Christmas alone. Alternatively, why not visit family you may not have seen in a while? You may find that they appreciate an extra pair of hands.

‘”There’s also the option to offer to look after the pet of a neighbour or friend who is away for Christmas. Not only will you be helping them out, but your Christmas just got a little less lonely.’’

Create new traditions

‘’You’ve probably not spent a Christmas alone for a number of years, maybe it’s time to see it as a positive opportunity. You can create your own traditions, whether that means spending more time with friends, visiting a new city or going on holiday. It’s also the time to create new traditions with your children.’’

It’s not forever

"You may not be able to spend Christmas Day with your children this year but that doesn’t mean it’s forever. A lot of parents find that alternating years works for them, that way you know that you’ve got a busy Christmas to look forward to in the not too distant future.’’

https://www.co-oplegalservices.co.uk

(Image courtesy Manfred Antranias Zimmer from Pixabay)